What up girlie?
I’ve gotta tell you about the other day. It was the moment that everything flipped. You know how people are always preaching about finding your “why”? That one thing that’s supposed to light you up and keep you moving no matter how tough life gets?
Well, for YEARS, I couldn’t find mine. And let me tell you, the struggle? Frustrating as hell. My group coach has been talking about it forever, and every time she brought it up, I’d be over here like, “You make it sound so easy. Where’s my why, huh? Why can’t I just figure it out like everybody else?”
I used to think my why had to be something big. Something shiny. Like, “Oh, I’m doing this to inspire millions of women,” or “I’m gonna change the damn world.” But no matter how many goals I set or dreams I dreamed, nothing felt right. Nothing stuck.
Then just the other day, I was sitting in my kitchen, not even thinking about anything deep, and out of nowhere, it hit me. My why? It’s “Baby Girl”.
I felt like the wind got knocked outta me. I know you know, but Baby Girl is what I call Little Mikki. She’s me…just smaller, softer, and way more vulnerable. She’s the little girl who needed love, care, and attention but didn’t always get it.
And let me tell you, once I realized that, I couldn’t stop thinking about her. It was like everything in my life shifted. Every decision I make now, I ask myself: “What would I do if Baby Girl were right here, watching me?”
Like, if I’m about to eat something that doesn’t align with my goals, I stop and think: “Would I put this on Baby Girl’s plate?”
If I look around and my space is a mess, I think: “Would I want her living in this chaos?”
And when I catch myself talking trash to myself, saying stuff I wouldn’t dare say to anyone else, I pause and ask: “Would I EVER say this to her?”
It changes EVERYTHING. Every time I think about her, I want to do better…not out of shame, but out of love. Pure love. Because she deserves more.
Baby Girl deserves a clean, peaceful home where she feels safe. She deserves food that makes her feel strong and healthy, not sluggish and stuck. She deserves kind words, encouragement, and all the love in the world.
And the wildest part? She’s me. She’s still here, inside me, still waiting for that love.
But, this isn’t just about her…it’s about me too. If Baby Girl deserves the world, then so do I.
Here’s the thing…..I don’t blame my mom for what I didn’t get back then. She was doing the best she could with what she knew, and honestly, how could I expect her to give me something she didn’t even know I needed?
That realization hit hard. Because if I can give her grace, why can’t I give myself that same grace? Why can’t I look at 16-year-old me, trying to figure out motherhood, and say, “Girl, you did the best you could”?
It’s wild how quick we are to forgive others but drag ourselves for stuff we didn’t know at the time. Nah. I’m done with that.
This is my do-over. A chance to rewrite the story…not just for Baby Girl, but for me too. I’m finally giving her the love she’s been waiting for, and in doing that, I’m giving it to myself too.
Every time I choose her, I’m choosing me. Every time I tell her she’s enough, I’m telling myself the same thing. And let me tell you, that feels so good. It feels like freedom.
This isn’t about punishment. It’s not about shame or guilt or beating myself up for the past. It’s love. Real, unconditional, overwhelming love. The kind I didn’t even know I needed until now.
Baby Girl deserves to feel safe, cared for, and adored. And because she’s me, that means I deserve it too.
I’m showing up for her now. I’m telling her:
Baby Girl, I’ve got you! You’re not alone anymore. You’re worthy of love, and I’m gonna make sure you know it every single day. You deserve peace, joy, and safety, and I’ll never stop working to give that to you. We’re in this together, and I’ll never let you down again. I promise!”
So, let me ask you: What does your Little You need? What’s that thing you wish you’d heard or felt back then?
Whatever it is, give it to yourself now. It’s not too late. You’ve been waiting long enough.
And so have they.
Until next time….
Love ya! Mean it!
